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Monday, July 11, 2011

Tired....

I'm tired of a lot of things right now, both in my life and in the world in general.  I'm tired of the Casey Anthony trial, and all the crap that came with it.  I'm tired of being tired.  I'm tired of being kicked my Mr. Karate Kid, Jr. (it really started hurting last night, like to the point it was making me jump...what's going to happen when I'm a bit further along and he's bigger/stronger?  I will have no internal organs left!)  While I'm on the subject of pregnancy, I'm tired of not being able to do things I was allowed to do 5 months ago, before I got pregnant (the litter boxes, and I feel horrible that I'm not helping with the brood of animals we have; being able to jump up on the counter to get a bowl from the top shelf, lifting and playing with my other kids; riding the cool rides at KI or the Beach with them; not feeling so worn out that I have NO energy to even pay attention to them; taking the garbage out; and even cleaning the kitchen or bathroom).  I'm tired of being poor, but I'm working on that one (one degree down, four to go...damn Ph.D's....).  I'm tired of feeling like I have to filter myself.  I do this and then I realize that this is SOOOO not me...  Okay, enough complaints for the day.

On the up side...My ten year anniversary to my hubby is tomorrow.  I have no idea what I'm going to get him/do for him, and to make matters worse, when I got our meal schedules together for the first half of the month, I scheduled "Leftovers" for our anniversary...WHAT was I thinking...  Of all the things I can do well, cooking is probably one of the best, so of course, when gifts are needed, I get to cooking/baking.  You would think that he would have put on some weight by now.... guess that's why our kids are so skinny and eat like a herd of elephants, and I keep getting told that I'm too skinny to be 5 months pregnant, yet I feel ginormous.  Of course, it doesn't really matter how I feel, because obviously I can't be that far along if I'm this small, and I have absolutely no right to feel ginormous if I'm this small.  I will do something I haven't done on this blog; post an ultrasound picture of my son.  We had a tier II ultrasound done to help rule out down syndrome.  Granted, ultrasounds are diagnostic in nature, and they obviously can't tell if there are any genetic issues without an amniocentesis, which I refuse to undergo (thanks for the horror stories mom), but EVERYTHING looks great.  I was comforted by both the specialty ultrasound tech and the perinatal expert I spoke with that the calcium deposit in Jesse's heart is completely fine, it will cause him no problems, his heart is functioning great, and this happens (calcium deposit in the heart) in about 1 in 50 pregnancies.  My chances of having a down baby are 1 in 800, same as any other woman my age, even with the soft marker of the calcium deposit, but it's not like that would change anything, finding out that the baby has down syndrome.  I mean, helloooo, he's my son, and I don't care what "special needs" he might have, I will love him no less and no more than my other children, and he will be provided for the only way I know how...the best way.  Now, without further ado...May I present to you, Mr. Jesse Donald Christopher Green:

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